I've been thinking about the future lately because I'm a big planner. I try to break this kind of thinking down chronologically from most immediate (summer: employment, time with friends, time with Danny, small events like the community yard sale and my sister's graduation/birthday party), interim (lab animal club organization, fourth year rotations) and longer-term (residency application, moving to wherever that will be, house, etc). That kind of helps my mind's tendency to explode all over the place and start to worry about things that I cannot control, especially at this point. Instead I focus most on the things that I can control and (here's the big one) that are most important for now (like I shouldn't be stewing about a residency until I've found a flipping summer job!)

BUT: Yesterday I got some *tentatively* good news for summer employment. I don't want to spill the beans until it's nailed down, though. I'm trying to temper my optimism but I can't help but feel hopeful that it will work out. Cross your fingers for me, please! What I can share (because it's already confirmed) is that I managed to secure a shadowing day with the veterinary faculty of a large, prestigious lab animal program at the end of June. They have NHP (and a residency program!) and I'm hopeful that even if I only get the one day, it will be a great experience.

So the past day or two have been an excellent exercise in finding the positives in life. Which reminds me that I still need a June resolution. Hrm.

It feels simultaneously like forever and like just yesterday that I last posted here - I don't even want to know how long its been! It has been one hell of a (however long its been) since I was here last, but fortunately all of the chaos is behind me. I got married on May 18th and had a wonderful honeymoon in Charleston and Savannah May 19-26th. Got to see my friend who came home from Afghanistan and his wife while in Savannah and generally had a lovely time in a warm climate. Got home that Sunday night, went to the Orioles/Nationals game on Memorial Day, went to lunch with my sister for her birthday yesterday (well, her birthday was the 28th) and now I can finally say I've made it to the other side of the black hole of craziness that had been looming ahead of me for the last month or so of school. Finals, wedding, honeymoon, all done and out of the way.

I have a lot of stuff still to do for the summer, but the bulk of it has come and gone and I feel (mostly) at peace. To do lists have always been one of my favorite things and now that there isn't wedding stuff or school stuff on them it isn't so bad churning through them.

I'm happy to report that May's monthly resolution of making myself more presentable has been going excellently. I bought myself a new shirt, denim skirt and bright coral shorts and have started to wear some of the nicer clothes that are already in my closet. The only hindrance is money right now - with no summer job whatsoever I have zero income, so I don't feel quite right going out and buying a bunch of new clothes. But I think I've been doing a good job with what I have. No idea about June's resolution yet, but I still have a couple of days left!

One of the ingredients of the chaos stew that I was dealing with through April was having what would have been an amazing summer experience fall through. One of the reasons I was so upset about it was that I'm planning to pursue residency after graduating and from what I understand, it's beneficial to have a demonstrated continual interest in the field. I've got over three years of lab animal work already under my belt, a year of research and involvement in our school's lab animal club, but I was really hoping to continue the trend this summer. So I can't help but feel a bit panicky about having absolutely nothing lined up for the summer after my wedding.

I started hunting around online today and found a couple of options that aren't lab animal and are quasi-research-ish. So I'm going to get my applications done this weekend (in all of my spare time, right?) and cross my fingers. Because I really, really don't know what else I can do.

Busy busy busy!

Got a lot of wedding planning stuff taken care of last night with my parents, but still SO much to do! This weekend is going to be hectic - picking out and planting the flowers for my centerpieces, buying alcohol for the reception (and making a test pitcher of sangria for the rehearsal dinner) and combing Pinterest for some last minute wedding ideas. Nevermind the fact that I have thirty seven billion other things to do in just ten days.

Danny is coming over for dinner and the hockey game tonight - I'm planning to make the beer braised chicken that my mom likes so well for them and hopefully a new black bean cakes recipe I found yesterday for myself. Another new "ingredient" I tried today was a vegan burger for lunch which was OK - not super but edible. I've noticed that even if I'm not crazy about something the first time I can kind of talk my tastebuds around after a couple tries so I think it will be one of those things. Hoping the black bean cakes turn out well - maybe I'll even post an annoying picture ;)

Recently I've been thinking again about going vegetarian. Back in February, my resolution to eat less meat went really well and I've continued to eat less overall, although the amount has probably snuck back up after PEI Burger Love in April and coming home to a distinctly omnivorous household. I realized that eating less meat makes me feel somehow better overall - morally, yes, but also health-wise. I can't exactly pinpoint what it is, but I just feel good when I eat less meat.

So I've returned to considering full out vegetarianism. The hardest part for my February resolution was finding recipes, ingredients and snacks that were vegetarian that seemed easy. Sorry, but I can't really afford to go out and drop a bunch of money on some particular exotic spice or weird vegetable. After I was able to get a few regulars under my belt, though, it became a lot easier. So I think continuing to expand my recipe horizons is a key element. (Fortunately there's a boat load of good vegetarian recipes out there, it's just a matter of sifting through them!)

The other tricky part is that my wonderful almost-husband and the parents that I live with for the summer are strongly omnivorous.  When I'm home, I make an effort to pitch in around the house by keeping my spaces clean, mowing the lawn and making dinner. If I were by myself, making vegetarian dinner wouldn't ordinarily be an issue; with the others around I feel obligated to make something meat-based. I think my solution will be to make a vegetarian entree and then make a "side" of meat that they can add in or eat in addition to the entree. The last thing I want to be is a preachy vegetarian.

Which brings me to my last point...telling people about my decision. I gave up pork in my first year of vet school and when asked, I do my best to be as neutral as possible and just say, "I don't agree with how pork is raised." But (if you remember an earlier post where I went to a CFIA lecture on slaughter), it's past that now. I don't agree with how most meat is raised, transported and slaughtered. In the end my problem is not at all with raising animals to be eaten, or eating animals; it's the way that it's done that I just can't get over. But that's all a bit complex to explain to someone casually asking if you want ribs at your rehearsal dinner.

So I think I'm going to go back to quantifying my meat intake like I did in February (three meat meals per week). After that I may be ready to make the leap!

Hello again everyone :) Finally I'm able to get back to this blog. I'm so sorry for being quiet the past month but it has been a whirlwind few weeks. Wedding planning has become even more intense - it's finally crunch time and I'm going to be running around the next few two(!!) weeks getting all of the little details hung together and coordinating everything. It's a super daunting task but I think with the help of my fiance, family and friends we can pull it off! Mostly I'm excited for the honeymoon afterwards. We're going to Charleston and Savannah and I cannot wait for the warmth and the activities and just getting to be with Danny.

School finished uneventfully - exams went well and I managed to pack everything into the car on Thursday and roll out after pharm/tox on Friday morning. The trip was boring but went well - so nice not to have to worry about it snowing like I do when I come home for winter break!

As you may have already guessed, April's monthly resolution was a bust. I realized that there was no way I was going to be able to focus on a resolution when I had finals and wedding and packing and moving and all that jazz. Just not going to happen. I don't feel too badly about it because instead of trying and failing to complete the resolution, I never really committed to it in the first place. So it wasn't exactly a failure on my part, just a lesson learned that sometimes things like that have to take a backseat to more important things like passing finals ;)

I talked to my fiance yesterday on a ride to a friend's cook-out about how I wanted to try and be a bit more presentable. We discussed and I was pleasantly surprised to hear he feels the same way I do: by entering into our marriage, we're no longer just "representing" ourselves. So I want to put a bit more effort into my appearance as a whole (including wearing something a touch nicer than a tshirt every day, wearing some low-key make up a bit more, skin care, hair care, etc) and the perfect way to start is making it my resolution for May!